Thursday, March 25, 2010
I just returned from our parish's Mass for the sick, and it was such a cozy, close, warm mass. Our pastor is moving the Eucharist back behind the altar from the side of the altar so Mass was in the parish hall, and my face was literally 12 inches from Fr. B. He is so deep and devout, and when he gives his homily you feel like he is TALKING DIRECTLY TO YOU ABOUT YOUR LIFE! Tonight was no different. He started out about how his spiritual director in seminary was a recovering alcoholic and such a holy man who would spend hours in front of the sacrement praying daily. He told him about giving it ALL TO GOD, not giving it and taking it back a few days later. So many times we offer our problems to God for Him to take care of it, but don't trust enough and end up taking it back because we "need" to have something to worry about, we can't trust enough that God will take care of it because only He knows the deepest desires of our hearts. Of course I think he is talking right at me! We have emailed and he knows all about our losses, and knows that I need to give it ALL to God, but haven't been able to let go of the worry and need yet.
Mary (as a young 14 year old girl, can you imagine?? I always tell my 7th grade religion class - that is YOU in a year or two!) gave up her entire will of her life, marriage, falling in love, having children with her spouse, many children, and more. She gave into God's will for her life! The angel of the Lord told her fear not, you are the handmaiden of the Lord, and what did she answer? Be it done to me according to your word. Fr. said can you imagine? She had total trust in God, didn't worry about what her parents would say, that her betrothed would probably leave her, and worst still - that she could be stoned to death! If she can do it ladies....we damn sure better try! He also said more portraits and pictures are painted of the annunciation than any other event of mankind, painted by Christians and Non Christians alike.
This morning as I was reading the daily readings (anyone with a smartphone or iphone, best app ever is SINCERE PRAYER. It has podcasts, virtual rosary, daily readings, reflections, and more. I LOVE IT!) I thought about Mary - such a young, scared woman who was suddenly pregnant. I thought about all of us who would KILL to be pregnant (and keep it) and then I thought about women who are finding out today they are pregnant and are devastated. Women who are in abusive relationships, women who don't know the fathers of their baby, women who are contemplating abortion, women who are teenage girls. Instead of praying for me to be blessed with a healthy pregnancy carried to term....I prayed for those who are not looking at the pink lines with joy, but rather with dread. I can't imagine feeling like that, and they are the ones to be prayed for and pitied, I feel like today.