So.......we met with the social worker last week and she gave us some good suggestions and advice. She asked when the last miscarraige was and I told her August - she said, " we needed to wait a little longer before we start applying because we are probably not emotionally ready, the last loss has been too recent. We also need to start start saving and really be emotionally ready. Adoption chooses you, not the the other way around. It is hard to mix a baby hungry IFer or RPLer with tunnel vision for a baby with a scared-to-death-trying-to-make-an-unselfish-decision mother with a good outcome. We need to be completely ready so we can make the connection with a birth mother and not have such a sense of urgency that we end up scaring her more".
She suggested several books for us to read and to make an appointment with a local adoption lawyer that she knows to be a good Christian man and lawyer. We are going this Thursday at 4 for a free consultation at his office and she said he will give us even more advice and help. She wants us to come back in a month when we have sorted through all the information and make some solid decisions, so that is where we are at this point. Researching, planning, talking, and praying.
The cost can be lower with private, and the wait time shorter, but there can be more risks. I still can't believe it costs that much, but in the end, it could cost one million and it would be worth that one healthy baby!
Most of the adoption agencies are run by religious groups and they place babies with couple from thier own denominations first. There are 5 major agencies around us and they are supported by Church of Christ, Methodist, Evangelicals, Jewish, and of course, Catholic Charities. Sadly, Catholic Charities only placed 1 child last year :( I found a Catholic agency up north in St. Paul, Minnesota JBTC, do you know of Holy Family Adoptions? I emailed them and they haven't written back and thier website is vague at best. Another agency the social worker gave them thumbs up on is Abrazo in San Antonio, TX.In order to apply you must have documented infertility from your doctor, and I am calling the office tomorrow to ask him to write me a letter stating our problems.
So here's to Thursday and hopefully some more good information!
Any advice on other agencies to try? We have researched Gladney, Bethany, Abrazo, and a few international agencies. Thanks to all of you who have advised already (Ann, Barbie, and Lauren :)